Mother’s Day
Mother's Day—a day that once held so much joy, now serves as a painful reminder of the son I've lost. Samson, my firstborn, made this day complete for me. Without him, Mother's Day wouldn't exist in my world. But this year, like every day since he left us, I find myself unprepared to face the void his absence has left behind. Days that are meant to be monumental, days that hold special significance, they're the hardest to bear.
I woke up with the intention of attending church, trying to muster the strength to navigate this day. But then Dad brought in my Mother's Day present, and I crumbled. He had been working on it for a while, meticulously polishing the agates you had collected, selecting the most beautiful ones, and crafting them into necklaces for me. It was such a thoughtful gesture, a tangible reminder of your presence in my life. Holding one of those necklaces in my hands, knowing it was something you, Samson, had collected, it felt like a joint gift—as if you had crafted it with him.
We sat together for a long time after that, Dad and I, talking about you. We spoke of the unfairness of it all, of how this day will never be the same for me. It's part of the aftermath of losing a child—certain things will forever be tainted, and my perspective forever skewed. Nothing will ever be the same.
The loss of a child is a reality no parent should ever have to face. The void it leaves behind is gaping, consuming, and unfathomable. Some parents have children simply to fulfill a societal expectation or to expand their family, but for others, like me, our children become our entire world. Samson wasn't just my son; he was my universe.
From the moment he came into my life, Samson became the focal point of my existence. Every decision, every action revolved around him. He was the center of my universe, the light that illuminated my days. To lose him is to lose a part of myself, a piece of my heart that can never be made whole again.
To every mother who faces Mother's Day without their child by their side, my heart and love go out to you. I extend a virtual hug across the screen, knowing that no words can fully ease the pain of your loss. Samson, my precious son, I carry your love in my heart always. Until the day we are reunited, my love for you will endure.
